Christmas and New Year’s Eve are just around the corner, so we can celebrate at home with the ones we love. It is a time to share as a family and express acts of love to our relatives or friends. However, many families for various circumstances can not share together, some have a loved one in a hospital, even, there are grandparents who no one will visit at Christmas. It is a little ironic that in the month of December, where there should be more love, there may also be sadness and loneliness in some people. For this reason, this brief article will try to make a reflection on love taking into account the thought of Karol Wojtyla, so that we can understand how loving others makes us more human; and also reflect, but above all, and act with acts of love, friendship or sympathy towards those people who may feel lonely or sad at this time of the year.
Love as the perfection and finality of the human person
Accompanying people in a state of loneliness, or offering a greeting to vulnerable people at this time of year is not only an act of solidarity, but also allows us to grow as people. Love and friendship allow the improvement of the person. And unlike eating or reproducing, activities that are the province of most living beings, love is a uniquely human act. Indeed, Karol Wojtyla will affirm that “love is the fullest realization of the possibilities of the human being. It is the maximum actualization of the person’s own potentiality, which finds in love the greatest fullness of his being, of his objective existence” (Wojtyla, 2013, p.56) This is so because love involves will and freedom, two essential faculties of every human person.
Love allows to “exercise” these two faculties: freedom and will; because when one loves, one loves freely, loving is one of the greatest acts of freedom; and also the will is “exercised” because it sees the person as a good in itself, as someone to whom to donate oneself. Love is an exclusively human act since it allows us to overcome those impulses or inclinations of nature. An example of this is when a mother, in spite of having worked a whole day, comes home to take care of her baby, and even stays up all night for him; she overcomes tiredness and exhaustion out of love. Another example is when a father who has not eaten all day prefers to give food to his child and not eat himself; he overcomes the circumstance through his freedom and will. This is something only human beings do. Therefore, “love is the fullest realization of the possibilities of the human being.” (Wojtyla, 2013, p.56)
Explanation of love
However, examples of love have been given, and love has been partially defined, but what does love really consist of? Love, according to Wojtyla “is always a mutual relationship of persons, which in turn is founded on the individual and common attitude of both towards the good”(Wojtyla, 2013, p.50). Love is to want the good for someone, it is to see the person as a true good and to give oneself, to donate oneself. In general terms this is love, however, it has degrees. Among the different degrees of love are: 1. Concupiscent love: this love only sees the person as a pleasurable good, and seeks its own good, but forgets the good of the other 2. Love of benevolence: It loves the person as a true good, not for his qualities but for the value of the person. Likewise, it wants to achieve good for itself as well as for the other. Betrothed Love: This love, in addition to seeking the good for the other person, and loving the person for what he or she truly is, is the surrender of one’s whole being to the other. According to Wojtyla, this is the most perfect form of love. The important thing to emphasize is that we as young people and all human beings in general, regardless of their culture or nationality can give ourselves to the other person, can help the other person to seek and achieve a good, to achieve happiness and bring meaning to their life. Because it is something of our nature.
Connection between love and dignity
Before concluding, I would like to mention that there is a relationship between love and human dignity. Love allows us to “understand” the dignity of the other. When you love someone, you love them mainly for what they are, that is, for their personal value. One can love other values of the person: such as his sweetness, intelligence, courage, his eyes or body; but, these values are subordinate to loving the person in himself first. This is the reason why a love lasts several years, the reason why the person is loved. In loving the person, one keeps in mind that one loves someone with dignity; for love to be true and not an interest, one has to love the person according to his or her nature, that is, according to a nature that has dignity. Moreover, in love, the person considers himself as someone valuable, as someone who has value for himself and can share that which is valuable to another being.
Conclusion
Love is an act that makes us become better people, that allows us to develop humanly, by “exercising” our freedom and will; also that, if it is a true love, it allows us to recognize the dignity of the other, his or her personal value, because we love the person in himself or herself. Likewise, love allows us to create a community, not only between the couple, but also between friends and people around us. Another aspect is that love, although it may start from a concupiscent love, looking for the good for itself, can be transformed and elevated to the donation and search of the good for the other. This is important to keep in mind for this month, since we can make acts of love with our family, with friends and partners seeking the good for them, a true good that brings happiness to their lives; but we can also make acts of love with other people, those who are lonely or sad these days, because we can donate a little of ourselves, of our time and life for them, and thus give meaning to our lives and be better people.
Published: December 8, 2021
Written by Ricardo Suarez, Project Management Intern for WYA Latin America.
References:
Wojtyla, K. (2013) Amor y responsabilidad. Madrid, España: Palabra
